"It's about Jimmy's and.... put that gun down Chris..... ahhhhh"

I hereby do solemnly swear that over the weekend I will do my post about drafting strategies. But for now a few random irritations: 1) "We run a spread offense because it puts more atheletes on the field, in space where they can make plays, and so we can force the defense to cover the entire field which opens up opportunities for our inside running game." -- Anyone who spends any amount of time on Coaching forums, particularly Coach Huey, will recognise this kind of statement. And it makes me choke everytime I read it. Is a an O-linemen not an athelete now? Aren't the receivers on an I-formation team still "in space where they can make plays?". And forcing the defense to cover the whole field to open up space for the running game, haven't I heard that somewhere before? Isn't that just Bill Walshs' philosophy for the WCO? What I hate most about statements like the one above is that they're just 'slogannising'. It sounds cool, it sounds sexy. Most people, even the coaches saying it, don't have a god damn clue what it means. It's just talk. Usually followed by this next statement. 2) "It's about Jimmy's and Joes, not X's and O's" -- which basically translates as, "I have no idea what the hell I'm doing". To me this is the ultimate excuse. When you lose, it's the "Jimmys & Joes" fault. Because you didn't have any right? Or the other teams were bigger, faster, stronger. But when you win, it's all "well, that's because my super-spread-no-huddle-shotgun-whistles-and-bells-offense put the Jimmy's and Joes in the right place" etc ad nauseum. Essentially what you're doing is taking all the blame off yourself and placing it on the kids, while being fully prepared to steal their thunder when they win a game. 3) "You can coach that, you get out of bed with it" -- listen up Sterling Sharpe, this is you all over my friend. The theory goes as such; that it is impossible to coach a player to be a good QB, to be able to read defenses, to make a guy run faster etc. This is horsesh%t. You can teach any guy to run faster. You can ask a player to diet and lose weight while working on his running technique and weight program, plyometrics etc. You can make any reasonably tall guy put on weight, hit the lifting room and then teach him how to block like an Offensive Tackle. It's merely a question of whether the player and the coach are prepared to do the necessary work. About the only thing you can't 'coach' is height. Well that's another rant done for the day. Respect to Jamie Dukes who bizzarely since my post about him interrupting people has actually stopped doing it. Let's be sure here that I consider that to be nothing more than coincidence as opposed to him actually reading this. Though you never know......